Friday, September 21, 2007

Konservo's New Act Debuts!

Crowd excitement was once again high as the lights dimmed at the Lookout Bar & Bistro in Ottawa's hot clubbing district, the Market, where latest sensation Konservo was preparing to launch his highly anticipated new act, kept shrouded in mystery until this evening. Our guest correspondent "Nigel" was on the scene and penned the eyewitness acccount which follows.

- - - - -

Well, let me just say, first of all, that the atmosphere in the Club was absolutely so electric. The whole community has been abuzz ever since the Ethel Merman act - replica wigs popped up just overnight! - but the thing that has made Konservo so compelling is the way he has kept us all guessing. The closing night of the Merman act he came out to do the encore as Streisand. Completely took everyone by surprise! His rendition of The Way We Were among the tables, in one case actually climbing onto my friend Lionel's lap and crooning in his memorable, I can't begin to tell you. He's just always fresh.

The cheering and the calls of "Ser-VO! Ser-VO!" started a full five minutes before the stage lights finally came up on low. The fog machine started, cranking out clouds across the stage and into the audience, and the curtain went up to a full moon and glowing stars covering the backdrop. We heard ripples of harp music and a plaintive flute melody. And then, there he was, soaring above the stage from a flying rig, in one of those Sally-Field style nun's habits! He launched into Fly Me To The Moon and, I have to say, he had us in the palm of his adorably-manicured hand from the first notes.

The toilet brush can-can in the habit was probably the one number of the act that didn't work for me. But Konservo really made up for it in the second set. He had a whole backup chorus of novices who came out singing How Do You Solve a Problem Like Konservo? and by the time the striptease started, it had turned into an audience participation sing-along. I still have the rosary I caught when "Sister Inarticulata" tossed it into the audience.

In short, the new act definitely gets two thumbs up from me, and the rest of the audience seemed to agree. Chalk up another surefire hit to the Market's premiere drag act of 2007!


Mr. President said...

Straight off the streets of m*th*rf*ck*ng Fairfax...
...(("Ser-VO! Ser-VO!"))
Dedicated, and by most Lefties hated...
...(("Ser-VO! Ser-VO!"))
Ladies and Gentlemen, put your hands together for...
...(("Ser-VO! Ser-VO!"))
KONSERVO!!! (aka Mr. President)

...(("Ser-VO! Ser-VO!"))
Who'd y'all come to see?!?!?!?!?!?

Anonymous said...

Nice to see Konservo embracing his inner cross-dresser at last...