Responding to an overwhelming influx of journalists' requests to make RALPH available for interview, the Ralph/Blat 2008 campaign is delighted to unveil the ***OFFICIAL*** RALPH Finger-Puppet.
An exclusive feature of the Ralph/Blat 2008 campaign, the RALPH Finger-Puppet utilizes groundbreaking Insta-Rapture™ technology, infusing the puppet with the SPIRIT OF RALPH upon assembly, thus enabling simultaneous interviews in multiple locations.
"MY FINGER-PUPPET IS SO EASY TO USE, MAYBE EVEN PATHETIC LIBTARDS CAN HANDLE IT!" declared RALPH.
While RALPH is a singularly modest, humble and soft-spoken candidate, he does request that the following items be made available in the green room prior to any finger-puppet interviews:
- A small fruit basket
- A large tub of library paste with a soup spoon
- One pair crotchless pantaloons, size L
- Spatula (optional)